aworldwithoutboxes | MATCHMAKING POST: PRIDE 2023

MATCHMAKING POST: PRIDE 2023

LYNDON'S OPEN MATCHMAKING POST 2023: PRIDE EDITION

"What the hell is this, Lyndon?"

Good unnecessarily aggressive question, hypothetical person! Basically, do you remember that "Give me one of your characters and I'll match them with one of mine" Plurk meme?

"I'm a strawman you invented for this post why would I-"

ANYWAY, this post is like that, because I love that meme a lot and have way too many characters by far. So here is how this is gonna work, basically!

1. You leave a comment with a character journal you want matched up!

It's gonna be gay in some way bc pride month, even if that's Two Bisexuals, but include maybe what kinds of characters you think might ship well with yours, and like... a quick summary of their personality for me! Also specify if you're here for smut or not or if you want assumed cr or a particular relationship stage or... whatever other information you want to put in. Age range, certain characters/canons you definitely don't want, whatever! I wanna stretch out some of my lesser-used journals here, though, so no specific character requests!

2. I will reply with an offer!

You are obviously free to veto or respond or whatever, but I'll run through my muselist (or inevitably for someone make a whole damn new account) and find someone and reply with an ooc hashing-things-out comment. If it works, reply with a starter or an affirmation if you want me to start!

3. WATCH THAT MAGIC HAPPEN or potentially watch this idea crash and burn

Anything's possible when you believe!!!

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i'm gonna front ive been awake since 3am and it's 9:40pm rn i'm too tired to explain what is wrong with this woman but give me the toxic yuris

walks up to you like a fuckin sommelier SO, IN DESCENDING ORDER OF TOXICITY:

Drowned Ophelia from Brutal Legend - here, is... an embodiment of a woman who tried to drown herself in a pool of tears and is made up of tears and the power of goth metal, which like. That's gonna have to be au'd a little for SURE but if you want a kinda shitty goth rock gf who drives a hearse and once blew up a bridge while her ex was on it that's her.

Envy Adams from Scott Pilgrim (Comics) - here, is a different angle on the "musician who is secretly lying so fucking much" sitch, shoutout to being unhealthily attached to a music career ig.

Alex Chen from Life is Strange: True Colors - here, and i'm going to be real I'm offering her because she's sweet and nice and also her slice of life superpower is fucking Can Tell How People Actually Feel About The Things They Say and i think that would be funny Considering.

STARING DIRECTLY AT ENVY WITH THE WORLDS BIGGEST EYES EMOJI.... . FAKE GIRLS WHO FALL IN LOVE ABOUT IT???

the idea of them in two different bathrooms staring into two different mirrors saying "but i stay silly" and "but i stay angy" is so funny to me

yes. absolutely. how do you want to do this. are they touring together.

so hear me out. ai and b-komachi touring in the states and ai's english is just bad enough and envy's japanese is just barely good enough that they're like the only two people in both groups who have like 70% of a common language so they end up hanging out all the time out of necessity. And Then They Kiss

oh my god... envy living with the shame that her secret weeb past is back all these years after selling her merch for Cool Music Stuff

absolutely. do you have an idea for a specific point for a thread.

i had like a whole starter written up on my phone then when i went to retrieve it from my notes app it had vanished so now i have to chew it to pieces

the original plan was that they were going to be the only ones awake on the tour bus and have a late night slightly too vulnerable girl talk !!

[ IT'S OKAY I GOT U ]

[ The tour has been a success, by all metrics. Through Canada to start, and now swinging down into the States. It's a ways to the end of it, but it's been so... freeing, now that Scott's whole sad little story is behind her.

It's a weird pairing to be sure, a Canadian indie rock band and an idol group, but she's been secretly cribbing inspiration from Japanese media long enough that it feels like it might as well be time to pay back? Sure. She can go with that. We're all riding high off of the recent success of non-Western artists (and that one Clash at Demonhead single that went huge in Japan) and that's fine.

And it's obviously not like B-Komachi is bad company, such as it is. Envy's the only member of The Clash at Demonhead who speaks literally any Japanese, a product of being young and not trusting the old official subs for anime from the nineties, which means she's the only one who can keep any of them any company, but a lot of them don't have the English to meet her halfway, which is unfortunately what a girl needs when her Japanese education started with words like "hope" and "despair" and "Rose Bride." But Ai has.

Ai. It's been honestly refreshing to make what might be an actual friend in the industry - not that she'd categorize it like that herself, of course. Friends with the f in lower case aren't nearly as useful as Friends when it comes to being a pro musician. And she's sacrificed too much to get where she is. Even if-

Right now it's like one in the morning on an empty road somewhere outside of some town in the middle of the US, there's a whole night's drive ahead of them, and Envy can't sleep. She's out alone in the common area of the bus while everyone else (on this bus, anyway) is asleep, spiral notebook out and pen in hand. There's something so real about handwritten lyrics, even if that makes her sound like the most pretentious loser in the world. ]

... Alright, what rhymes with "night" and doesn't suck...?

[ Ai had always insisted to Saitou that she'd never go overseas for any kind of location shoot – the idea of piling onto an airplane and jetting out to some totally foreign place with nowhere to hide, surrounded by people she couldn't speak to or understand and no chance of being able to go home and turn off until all was said and done sounded excruciating. And while none of that had changed, exactly, her priorities had just a little. When it had just been her to worry about, the choice had been a one and done consideration but when she'd started thinking about in terms of Ruby and Aqua being able to come along, giving them the chance to see these new places and sneaking away to have normal family time in a place that didn't know her well enough to catch her in the act...

Well. Her tune was considerably changed after that.

The tour so far hasn't exactly been fun, even if Ai's been tolerating it well enough. There's nowhere to really breathe in the tour bus and she doesn't even have the comfort of having Ruby and Aqua nearby – they've been travelling with Miyako, just to keep up the ruse of just whose kids they are and she's been trying and failing not to be too grumpy about it. The language barrier has been a good buffer in keeping her from having to get along with the other girls more than she can stomach... but then there's Envy.

If she's honest with herself, as she so rarely is, talking to Envy hasn't been... terrible. They're muddling along with some horrible amalgamation of both their languages that would probably make a linguist cry to overhear it but works just fine for them. Envy gets mad, Envy doesn't take shit and it's sometimes a little refreshing for Ai to unload on her just a bit and let her go off on her behalf.

She's not really thinking of Envy when she eases herself out of bed, though. She's thinking that she's sick of sleeping hemmed in on all sides by other people and that it'll be a godsend if they ever get accommodation elsewhere. She could do with a little fresh air, so she makes her way to the door that leads out off the bus and– ]

Oh! [ She pauses, halfway out and looking a little unsure of herself. ] You're still awake?

Not tired.

[ It's a lie, of course. There's no point on a tour when anyone isn't at least a little exhausted. But, much like half of Aka Akasaka's characters, Envy's a practiced liar.

She gives a little less-than-half (a third, maybe?) smile as Ai walks in, settling into their hellish linguistic milieu. ]

Figured I'd try to at least be productive, but... the words are not coming tonight.

That's what happens when you try and force it. [ her voice is a little chiding, but playfully so – she knows she's not telling Envy anything she's not already aware of. ] But you wouldn't be trying to force it if you weren't stuck in the first place, right?

[ The night's a little chilly, but Ai ambles over without any apparent discomfort so she can peer over Envy's shoulder at the notes. It's not like she can actually read any of it, of course, but she's nosy anyway. ]

What does it say so far?

God, it barely matters, it's so cliché and... ugh.

[ A beat. ]

Do you know what cliché means, it's- it's a French word, god- point is, this crap isn't worth spending time on. It's been done.

[ Ai's gaze drifts up from the notes to Envy's face – she's getting used to reading what all the different sorts of scowls mean, an emotional vocabulary way more varied than the smiles Ai pastes on day to day. If she's reading this one right – and she thinks that she might be – then... ]

They do say pretty much everything under the sun's been done before... but is that really what you're so worked up over?

[ She doesn't think a little case of writer's block would have Envy quite this worked up. ]

i just think it would be funny to make you think about shipping with her

jesus christ

you don't need the long descriptions what flavor of stupid are you looking for

janis would have just dated zoe post-curtains if she didn't already have four girlfriends huh

but now i'm just thinking about nancy drew and zoe working together to solve the mystery of her brother's death

how COULD he have killed himself if he was doing so well in those weird tree emails!!!

yes 100% i am down

[Nobody believed Zoe when she said Connor didn't kill himself.

It didn't make any sense—he was genuinely doing better for the first time in his life and maybe their parents didn't know that but Zoe did. The new school and meds working for him and he had a boyfriend who seemed to be really good for him... none of it fucking adds up and everyone has been telling her that's what it's like. Death doesn't make sense, especially not suicide.

But she's heard Nancy Drew solves mysteries and Zoe wants this one solved.]

I don't even know where to start, just... nobody thinks my brother was murdered but me.

Edited (dw don't send it before i'm done) 2023-07-03 06:36 (UTC)

Tosses a rough-and-tumblr brawler who's actually a major softy underneath all her scars at u

ahem well on ze menu we have...

Entrapta from She-Ra - it's entrapta. you know her. i may not have seen arcane but i know what piltover and zaun are like about technology.

Naomi Fairchild from Arcade Hearts - here, I'll have to whip up some icons but!! nerdy twenty-something girl who loves repairing and maintaining old arcade cabinets if you want a more normal gf for her!! either vi can be a tough girl in the cyberpunk near future of arcade spirits or arcades can be real in league of legends.

Alex Chen from Life is Strange: True Colors - pretty sure you also know her but. if you want a nice but also slightly rough and tumble musician gf i suppose

man, the sad part is that entrapa would probably remind vi too much of her sister

Naomi would also be fun but now I can only picture Vi in the vein of Life is Strange where she's all hard punk but there's soft acoustic in the background

Alex would probably also have a panic attack looking at Vi's aura

listen counterpoint foster care has probably 100% made her able to appreciate that sort of thing, even if she doesn't like the feedback

POINT TAKEN

two soft women with Backstory it is. Just consider Vi being a small town mechanic with a bit of a chip on her shoulder.

Feral racoon of a vaguely-teenaged supersoldier experiment, come at me.

offers u a menu we goooooot

Doric from Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves - here, a slightly antisocial and very Matter Of Fact druid. I believe you have seen the film.

Merida from Brave - here, I just think she would bring home a child soldier like "I'M KEEPING HER NO ONE CAN STOP ME"

Just A Second Feral Racoon

SADLY I HAVE NOT YET SEEN THR DND MOVIE but I have heard excellent things

That said the idea of her and Merida enabling each other into chaos calls to me.

Given that Echo is from a sci-fi type setting I can AU her into a Brave type fantasy setting, or we could do some kind of Isekai jamjar thing.

But please also consider - a small ship or escape pod of some sort ends up real off-course and just kind of crashes in pseudo-historical Scotland.

oh my god ANCIENT ALIENS.......... i love it. yes. come 2 scotland, echo.

[Shooting stars aren't so uncommon, in the warm summer nights of Scotland. What might be less common is a flash high in the sky, and a shotgun scattering of light and flames streaking out and away from it. One light streaking down, closer and bigger and screaming louder and louder through the air into the densely packed forests nearby- one might dare go so far as calling that "rare" or perhaps even venture a "mom, holy fuck".]

[The impact is perhaps less than one might expect, if one were familiar enough with astrophysics to understand the force a space-rock usually has when hitting ground, the padding of a thickly wooded area or not. Trees lose branches, trunks snapped by the shooting descent; more lose their leaves or bark at the moment of impact.]

[At the center of it all- an oddly metallic, spherical rock- yeah, okay, that's not a rock, not even anyone from Vaguely Historical Ye Olde Scotsland would mistake it for anything natural. But it's there, smoking slightly and venting what one can only hope is just steam or hot air.]

[And then it cracks, part of the surface lifting away on an invisible hinge. For an inch or so.]

[A few frustrated impacts come from inside, the hatch cracking forcibly open and its occupant making an awkward, newborn deer kind of exit, rolling heavily onto the ground. She grabs at her dislodged hat, waving away the steam and dusty debris hanging in the air with a few hacking coughs.]

Okay. Alive. Ow. Better be worth it.

[A small bell dings within the metallic pod, now hanging open.]

Thank you for choosing TurboLYFT® Evacuation Services! Getting you down with your spirits up! Thank you for choosing TurboLYFT® Evacuation Services! Getting you down with your spirits up! Thank you for choosing TurboLYFT® Evacuation Services! Now sending consumer experience feedback, may include data pertaining to-

AH, nope nope nope, that's a bad, stop talking, go to sleep-

[And Echo is back to hanging half out of the smoking pod, tugging and prying at something on its interior.]

[ There are things in Historical Scotland that, of course, cannot be explained by methods of mortal ken, ye ken? So when a star crashes to the ground, it's easy to assume that it's the sort of thing that ought not be chased. Most, in fact, would see this and go back to tending their sheep or uh. Tossing cabers? You know, Scottish stuff.

Not Princess Merida, though. Merida has dealt with witches and faced down bears and followed Will-o-the-wisps, and... well, you know the plot of Brave. So when something strange happens in the wilds of her kingdom? She's the first to ride towards it.

She doesn't know what to expect, of course, and on arrival... and "a girl" was very low on her list of possibilities. Not that she had much of a list, really, this was 100% the kind of "leaping without looking" thing she was supposed to have stopped doing after the whole bear fiasco, but like... look, this is the sort of thing you just go for!!

So Echo is going to be greeted, whenever that racket from inside the Orb quiets down, by a teenage girl with a bow trained on her. In case she's a demon or something? ]

State, uh... state yer business in this forest!

[ Yeah, that'll show her! ]

Gotcha-

[The warbling electronic voice cuts off with a squawk and a spark, Echo wiggling her way back out of the pod with a small, modular, electric component of the ship in one hand. And- came face to face with some truly impressive red curls and- was that a bow and arrow?]

[Huge amounts of combat data and information genetically buried into her subconscious, and that was still archaic enough to take a second to identify, okay.]

Heep.

[And just. Kind of flipping and diving into the nearest available shelter against ballistic pointy stick. Back into the escape pod, still smoking just a bit ominously.]

[This was less than ideal.]

[She gives a small, cautious wave from her position plastered to the small interior wall of the pod beside the exit hatch.]

Right now? Not getting shot, mostly. Not here on purpose. ...Is this your forest? It's nice, very green, very, uh- inflammable.

[she is going to be on the hook for so many trees and plants this must be so expensive she has never been gladder to not legally exist]

It's... well, it's not my forest, technically, it's my father's, but-

[ She relaxes the bow enough to wave a hand, and keeps it relaxed after. ]

But I assume from the jumping back and lack of fighting back that ye aren't... immediately dangerous...?

Yes? Yes, being not dangerous is one of my favorite things. I mean just personally, I've noticed people tend to get hurt if I have to fight and even aside from just kind of wanting to avoid that it tends to escalate things and turn into a whole THING and- no, not dangerous.

[nailing it]

[Her hand is currently arrow free, she follows it up by peeking out the hatch. The lack of arrows flying at her face is encouraging enough that she slips out some more, sitting on the lip of the exit and looking as non-threatening as possible.]

Just- you know, passing through. Accidentally. ...Don't actually know where this is, but I can be out of your hair and off-planet as soon as I can get to the nearest city.

So hey, here's my ship bicycle. She used to be your Average Anime Dude Protagonist but since her canon was a sexswap fanservice series, she's now a tall, pretty girl with long legs and big boobs who is incredibly flustered by all of the attention this gets her. Especially from other pretty girls.

Much as I make fun of the canon and the fanservice though, Natsuru is really sweet and caring and a huge dork that's fun to play off more confident types. She also tends to attract... people with a manipulative streak... since she's both a kind of passive, go-with-the-flow type and will mentally excuse everything for someone she's infatuated with...

I don't know who I have who's manipulative in an actual relationship lmao all my jerks are soft about people they like BUT!!!

Amanda from Dream Daddy - here, one of my own ship bicycles! She's cute and smart and funny and likes photography and trashy reality TV. Ideal for soft shit but like. With jokes.

Maddie Hatter from Ever After High - here, she's uh. She's weird. She's a weirdo. Have you ever seen her without this hat on? She's the daughter of the Mad Hatter from Alice in Wonderland, she can hear narration, and she's wildly quirky but also very sweet.

Sumireko Hanabusa from Akuma no Riddle - here, if you just want a like. Slightly mean rich girl. I generally prefer to play her from after her Murder Era but she's definitely a little manipulative by default. She can cook, tho!

Oh no, I love heightened ridiculous quirky characters and slightly mean rich girls who are maybe softer about people they like...

Idk, I can easily imagine Natsuru being so smitten with Maddie that she just goes along with whatever weird quirky things she says or does (or wants to do) and is just confused the whole time but still enjoying spending time together. Meanwhile, I'm also a huge slut for like... power difference dynamics... whether they're full on like, master/servant type stuff or just rich and/or influential person with a normie... ~~Natsuru does have a sexy maid outfit either way, for the record...~~

i flipped a real coin and fate said sumireko SO

to get a little more in depth about her she uh. lost all of her limbs in an assassination attempt when she was little and trained to use prosthetics and also to kill people??? but she's over the killing people, unless there's a really good reason. so hell yeah natsuru come get fuckin pampered by your rich gf she'll be very nice to you even if she is not amazing at being genuinely nice just yet

God now I'm imagining that Sumireko just came across this poor girl who seems to be constantly manipulated and lightly bullied by everyone around her and just went "mine now", picked her up and took her home. Also can't get over the idea of her offering Natsuru a job as her maid as an excuse to keep her by her side (and protect and pamper her), but Natsuru being weirdly blushy about it and trying so hard to deserve Sumireko's kindness by doing literally anything for her. A way to have light trappings of a mistress/maid dynamic but also have them just be cute teenage girlfriends at the same time, y'know?

Only thing there is it'd be up to Sumireko to make the first move into dating and/or kissing ~~or more~~ territory, because lmao Natsuru having the spine to do anything like that...

oh that all sounds perfectly in line with her yeah

do you want to start like. at her making that first move or after she has, because sumireko is definitely capable of taking initiative

Excellent~!

Starting right at her making that first move sounds fantastic, because I love getting to play Natsuru at Peak Flustered melting into a gooey happy mess of feelings. Sumireko can interrupt her being a hyper-dutiful maid, or drag her out for an outing that's actually going to become a date, or invite her to her room for bonus sleepover vibe... or god, here's an idea... Natsuru helping Sumireko get ready for bed... even if that's not a thing they normally do, just. Using that excuse to have her close and make her move.

Something along any of those lines sound about right?

whoops i dropped this perfectly good luz noceda here

what a coincidence i have this amity blight right here

whatre you feeling for a setup

HM What indeed

maybe they finally get that beach episode they never got to have on account of being cut short?

omg yes

the real question is do they go to a human beach or a boiling isles beach

a boiling isles beach is so tempting but think of the shenanigans they could have on a beach with water that doesn't burn them at the touch!!

So we... just have to apply the one ointment before going to your beaches? Are you sure?

[ Here we are in the season three we deserved, on a group day at the beach! It's... an East Coast beach, it's not an amazing tropical beach, it's weirdly cold, but. ]

And we can... go into the water? On purpose?

Yyyup, just the one. I promise. No salves or magic creams.

[WE COULD'VE HAD IT AAAAAALLL - By that, we could've had a nice, west coast beach. Instead, it was much more cost effective to talk mama into a trip out to the nearest shore than a flight across the country.

Luz was just too happy to show Amity what Earth had to offer, and they'd already explored everything in the house. Now, the others had split to explore the shoreline, and Luz had stayed back to help her awesome girlfriend with the sunscreen.]

Yeah! The water is... Well, it's actually probably gonna be kinda cold? It's not like a San Francisco beach, but it's got charm!

[And weird smells.]

Brianna Lewis, Bria to her peers, is an intense, pretty and popular rich girl who suffers no nonsense, and hates things she deems to have no purpose. To her, a day relaxing is equal to “laying around like an idiot”. Intense and serious on the exterior, she holds a softer side and is extremely protective of those she deems hers. Bria knows she’s capable of commanding a power terrifying enough to protect herself and her sisterhood of girls—- but she’s also wise enough to know the cost of wearing a crown, and resists it with a steely resolve. Everything has a cost, she is careful to remind those around her, and Bria doesn’t want to be the one to have to pay it.

oh boy uhhhh teen drama let's go-

Clarissa from Oxenfree - here, a different flavor of intense popular girl - traumatized and very low-key but also really intense!!! Might hate everyone in any given room or might have never given a thought to them before in her life. But there's a less traumatized girl in there somewhere.

Dora from Dora and the Lost City of Gold - here, and HEAR ME OUT HEAR ME OUT.......... she's a cute nerd who basically can't turn off her productivity brain and im a sucker for opposites attract ok????

Jacqui Costa from Dry - here, an incredibly smart and streetwise girl who no longer speaks to her parents because they forced her onto medication and now mostly spends her time crashing in empty vacation/part-time homes in the greater Los Angeles area! Has a secret heart of gold also, but like. Mostly she's just brusque. So if you want to go the opposites attract angle in a different direction, she's your girl!

Mona Vanderwaal from Pretty Little Liars - here YOU KNOW HER, YOU LOVE HER, YOU UNDERSTAND HOW INEXPLICABLY MEAN THE NARRATIVE WAS TO HER!!! I generally strongly prefer to play her post-A in her weird partially-reformed-villain phase?

AND BONUS OPTION:

Penelope from The Grimrose Girls - here, assuming you've finished the first book this is a bonus option but if you haven't Do Not Pick Her.

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MATCHMAKING POST: PRIDE 2023

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cw: dear evan hansen's plot

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but if you're the alien and i'm the alien then who was phone

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